I have pushed myself just as hard since being at BYU-Idaho, which has paid off with my half-tuition scholarship. The problem is that I have calculated (as all nerdy perfectionists do) exactly what grades I will need to get this semester to bump my half-tuition scholarship to full. The achievement is possible on paper, and entering this semester I was set on getting my 3.8 that is necessary for a full tuition scholarship. Unfortunately, the calculator on my handy-dandy cell phone didn't factor in trying to balance my busiest semester of school yet, work and extravadance, and finishing wedding plans. Upon realizing that I will not be receiving a full tuition scholarship I felt terribly disappointed in myself. I should be doing better in school. But even more than that, and more disappointing than knowing I will not be saving that extra tuition money after all, I am disappointed knowing that this is my last chance at receiving a scholarship, and if I don't get a full tuition scholarship now, I never will get the chance to do so.
I have a sickness. A need to accomplish. I can't wait to graduate so that this getting straight A's nonsense is out of my life until I have a mini-me in high school, or perhaps more realistically, until I have a child who couldn't care less about achieving in school. I'm not sure which is worse, I guess it's a balancing act.
3 comments :
hey...you got a scholarship, that is something to be proud of!!
I think you are perfect! Don't be so hard on yourself. I love and miss you.
Oh my sheesh, I totally feel ya. Except for being awesome like you were in high school, I can totally relate. Being engaged and in school and working full time = a disaster. You've got to let one of them go, sort of. I chose school. See ya school. Better luck next time.
And besides that, you ARE awesome!!!
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